Maybe Life Really Does Begin at 30

Hey guys! I’ve been 30 for less than 90 days, but idk… I feel like I know so much already, and I feel different from the little girl that I was in my 20s. Am I delusional? Maybe.

I really can’t believe I’m saying this, but I don’t miss my twenties lol. I remember being in my teens and being so excited to turn 20 because I thought I’d have life all figured out. It would all just make sense, and everything would just click. LOL… big lie. But chatting about my twenties is another story for another time.

I love being 30. I entered this new age oh so proud of myself and all that I’ve accomplished, and for God’s mercy over my life. I lived so many different lives in my twenties that in my 30s, I just have this “why not” mentality.

I won’t lie though, quarter 1 of 2026 has had me in a tussle with the reality of being 30. The reality of being a Nigerian female who just hit 30. At least for me, it feels like life has even more meaning, and I’m constantly being reminded that time is not my friend… because if you think about it, time is not even a real thing. I mean, how are we already in April?!

This is the time where everyone, or mostly me, is asking God, “what is going on?” Because honestly… what’s going on sometimes?

I recently had a conversation with my friend about real-life woman decisions and the thoughts of grieving the life you thought you’d have by now. Immediately, she reminded me of a sermon she listened to at church about the danger of always grieving in that way, because it can almost seem like we’re not trusting God and we’re kind of putting a period in our own journey.

But it is kind of hard, you know.

At this age, people in our lives are doing so many things. They’re moving, buying houses, getting married, almost fiancés, having kids, planning their weddings, booking me to plan their special day… and there are some of us just figuring it out or just waiting.

And I feel like days after my 30th, there was this lingering feeling of… it’s time for me to make rational decisions based on my age. Idk, does that sound crazy?

I also hate that society has made us, especially women, feel this way. There are so many rules and so many things you “need” to do, and sometimes I feel like as women, we’re forced to believe that if we don’t have all these things in our thirties, then what are we really doing?

Like we have to say goodbye to what we thought we would have almost every single day. But honestly… Why do we have to say goodbye?

Idk, sometimes I feel like life truly begins in your 30s. I know I’m only a few days in, but guys, there’s just this feeling of “I got my ish together.” I know they always say your 20s are for learning, failing, making mistakes… but I feel like your 30s is where you have the coins to succeed lol. Your 30s is where you have the confidence, and your 30s is where you really start living life the way you want.

At least that’s what I’ve been doing. And I’ve enjoyed it.

But at the end of the day, things will linger that have me feeling like okay… I need to sit and consider the “what ifs.”

The reality is a lot of us, women and men, will someday watch others live in a moment we’re praying for. Whether it’s buying that house, moving out of your parents’ house, having that baby, getting that ring, buying that car… all those things will happen.

And for some reason, it’s a lot louder and more aggressive in your 30s.

I think what helps you get through this without feeling resentment or jealousy is knowing that it can also happen for you too, and celebrating those you love loud and proud.

Whenever I have friends or people around me accomplish something I hope to accomplish, I always tell myself that God is in the neighborhood… so mine is coming soon.

I won’t sit here and pretend that even while saying and thinking this, I haven’t been doubtful or that I haven’t shed a few tears. I’m human, not a robot.

But even in the midst of questioning things and crying or wondering when my time will come, I find joy in cheering for those who deserve it, speaking to God, and reminding myself that what’s meant for me will come, even when I don’t want to believe it.

I think Rihanna said it once, but you really gotta fake it until you believe it sometimes.

It’s life, and life happens for everyone in different ways.

There is so much more that comes with being in your 30s, but once I’m 30 and 6 months… maybe I’ll have more to say.